1. How has our upbringing in our families of origin created default patterns of either being avoidant or anxious in dealing with our conflicts?  
2. How can we accept each other? If we believe that Gd put us together with a higher purpose, how can we use that knowledge to truly accept each other's differences without trying to change one another? 
3. How did it affect you when there was conflict in your family? How did you react? 
4. How do you express anger? Are you aware of when you are becoming angry? 
5. What are your specific triggers? Do you know how to stop your anger from becoming rage?
6. How do we settle a disagreement? How long does it take before we are willing to compromise and move on?
 7. What are some of your biggest fears in life?
8. Is there something bothering you that you would like to have addressed? 
9. What will happen if we don’t change? What will it cost us?
10. What are we willing to sacrifice to change? 
11. What is a boundary that is non-negotiable for you? 
12. What do we now understand about each other and ourselves that we did not before? 
13. What strategies can we come up with to protect our children from our conflicts?