Self-Confidence
Self confidence is often confused with confidence itself. Confidence however is based on evidence from one's past. We look to our past experiences, knowledge and abilities to know we can take on a particular task. Confidence is based on a belief system that has evidence.
Self confidence is generated internally. Your ability to believe in yourself without any evidence or history around the thing you are about to undertake. Self-confidence is the emotion of growth which propels us forward. When we are self-confident we go after new endeavors and take risks regardless of our past failures.
Self confidence is the willingness to feel any emotion from loss to humiliation or fear. When we are self-confident, we are sure that emotions are momentary and will pass. When you are prepared to feel anything, you are developing the self-confidence necessary to move forward in life.
Ask yourself, What am I afraid to feel? Become willing to get friendly with uncomfortable emotions. Build up self confidence by having your own back.What does this mean? It means that when you make mistakes you don’t beat yourself up with destructive self talk. You lean in and move forward.
Being too reliant on confidence means that you will only attempt what you have done before. You will never grow. Cultivating self confidence however will open up endless doors of new possibility.
How can I do this?
Practice awareness of your thoughts, recognize what you are thinking. Do these thoughts serve my purpose? If not, understand you are in control, stop thinking this way.
What do I want to think? Make conscious and deliberate thoughts that will take you where you want to go. Keep your focus here, the other thoughts will weaken.
Develop a positive affirmation practice. Look in the mirror. Say nice things to yourself. Smile.
Make a list of your best qualities.
Spend time alone reflecting on your relationship with Gd. Are you able to verbally speak to G-d? Who else do you think will help you?
Engage with hobbies that make you feel joy. Be creative, try new things.
Do not limit or avoid activities that make you feel self-conscious or down, do them anyway.
Examples Of Thinking Patterns
Thinking I am unworthy, ugly or unprepared is counterproductive.
Instead: Think I am worthy, I am beautiful and prepared, I can do this. Give yourself a wink in the mirror. Only you can do this work, no one can do this for you.
Always attach an action to the thought. This is critical to changing the unwanted mindset. Thoughts remain in the spiritual realm until they are physically actualized.
Failure means that you’ve taken action. You have failed forward. This is the way life works. It is a universal law that any action moves you forward. The direction is your choice based upon your thoughts, feelings and actions. If you don’t like where you’re moving, you must first change the thought, that will change the feeling, then you can change the action and ultimately your direction.
We are all moving forward no matter what. If you feel like you are not moving forward it is actually a product of blocked thought patterns. What you want to achieve is rewiring the negative and blocked thought patterns that are holding you back.
